Let's discuss the idea of "Perspective," many of us use the term perspective in the context of, "one's point of view, the choice of context for opinions, beliefs, and experiences." And I believe to see another person's perspective on things, you must learn to separate from one's self at least for a moment. Just long enough to Look outside of yourself and abandon your own understanding and thoughts on a particular subject or event, and try to understand all the dynamics that influences another persons perspective. Hopefully, that made since. Now, my perspective on my life has been one of hard lessons.  But, I learned a lot.  You see, growning up tall and big,  that in itself brought on a level of understanding and responsibility. Then there's  growing up poor, which brought another level of dealing with the things in life that made no sense, like why I have to do without and someone else has plenty and does not appreciate it.  Or, things that don't seem to be fair, like working  extremely hard, and staying stagnant and the guy who hardly works gets the promotion. Sometimes, questioning the very idea of integrity.  Then there's my condition, I've felt so bad for so long, that it felt normal to me. Can you imagine having a perpetual headache, always feeling tired and run down, weight fluctuating, your concentration level almost non existing,  and I learned to cope and function inspite of that .  Now, as I am constantly required to look outside myself, and realize that it not all about me. I had to learn that it will be a rare thing for someone to do that for me. So, in turn I knew that my survival in this world was one where I had to require less. Which left me feeling lonely and misunderstood. I guess that a condition like Acromegaly was fitting. The support group that I turn to for answer call it a disease of loneliness, or being alone, an orphans disease. Which make since, since all my so-called friends don't check up on me anymore and I spend more and more time by myself. There has been some days where I've sat alone for hours, in a room, with no tv or radio on. In complete silence, and not have said a word. Just reflecting on my life and how things have change, and how to change thing for the better. Can you imagine, no human contact, no one to talk to, just you by yourself.  And as I learn more and more about this condition, like that my life span might be decreased by 10-15 years, and the uncertainty of what that actually means. I have little to no one to share that with. I'm currently 33 years old, what if I was on to live to 60, but with Acromegaly, that has been cut to 45 years old. I have no one to really talk about that with. And that doesn't give me much time to deal with everything thats going to happen in between here and then. But, where are my so called friends. The one's who claimed that we are family, the one's who have their children calling me uncle Oates. I could die tomorrow and they wouldnt know. And then I think about how they would act, once I was dead. would they pretend like thy knew me, or knew what I wanted. Cause they don't! Would anyone outside of my girlfriend and her family, my mother, sister and her two children care. Would they show respect to the people that really knew, and who were really here for me? I wonder, I hope they would. You see, my perspective is that I really have no close friends, except my girfriend Martinique Patryce Revels-Williams.
Wow, things change....